内疚 (Guilty)

Nei Jiu

你还不太懂 问 怎么又哭了
nǐ hái bù tài dǒng wèn zěn me yòu kū le
You still don't quite understand. Ask, why are you crying again?
那就是理由 我现在想要走
nà jiù shì lǐ yóu wǒ xiàn zài xiǎng yào zǒu
That's the reason. I want to leave now.
你以为一切都美好 抚摸我吻我的脸
nǐ yǐ wéi yī qiè dōu měi hǎo fǔ mō wǒ wěn wǒ de liǎn
You thought everything was beautiful, touching and kissing my face.
但这颗心不再为你跳 内疚藏不了
dàn zhè kē xīn bù zài wèi nǐ tiào nèi jiù cáng bù liǎo
But this heart no longer beats for you; guilt cannot be hidden.
我夺回我的自由 拼命地往外逃
wǒ duó huí wǒ de zì yóu pīn mìng dì wǎng wài táo
I reclaim my freedom, desperately trying to escape.
就算后悔在等著我 选择不留任何选择
jiù suàn hòu huǐ zài děng zhù wǒ xuǎn zé bù liú rèn hé xuǎn zé
Even if regret is waiting for me, I choose not to leave any choices.
我不是不爱了 也不是不快乐
wǒ bú shì bù ài le yě bú shì bù kuài lè
It's not that I don't love anymore, nor that I'm unhappy.
只是我的心跳 它已犯下了大错
zhǐ shì wǒ de xīn tiào tā yǐ fàn xià le dà cuò
It's just that my heartbeat has made a huge mistake.
不知游荡了多久 瞬间感觉失落
bù zhī yóu dàng le duō jiǔ shùn jiān gǎn jué shī luò
I don't know how long I've wandered, suddenly feeling lost.
眼前都是我们回忆 其他什么都看不到
yǎn qián dōu shì wǒ men huí yì qí tā shén me dōu kàn bú dào
Before me are all our memories; I can't see anything else.
这不是我要的 这不是我想的
zhè bú shì wǒ yào de zhè bú shì wǒ xiǎng de
This is not what I want; this is not what I think.
自由不是自由 爱或不爱都罪恶
zì yóu bú shì zì yóu ài huò bù ài dōu zuì è
Freedom is not freedom; love or not loving is a sin.
贪图假象的 否定拥有的
tān tú jiǎ xiàng de fǒu dìng yōng yǒu de
Grasping at illusions, denying what I have.
这就是理由 抛下了所有
zhè jiù shì lǐ yóu pāo xià le suǒ yǒu
That's the reason; I left everything behind.
我以为一切会美好 任性地去感觉
wǒ yǐ wéi yī qiè huì měi hǎo rèn xìng dì qù gǎn jué
I thought everything would be beautiful, willfully going with my feelings.
等这颗心全被破坏 回头已经太晚
děng zhè kē xīn quán bèi pò huài huí tóu yǐ jīng tài wǎn
By the time this heart is completely destroyed, it will be too late to turn back.
我夺回我的自由 拼命地往外逃
wǒ duó huí wǒ de zì yóu pīn mìng dì wǎng wài táo
I reclaim my freedom, desperately trying to escape.
就算后悔在等著我 选择不留任何选择
jiù suàn hòu huǐ zài děng zhù wǒ xuǎn zé bù liú rèn hé xuǎn zé
Even if regret is waiting for me, I choose not to leave any choices.
我不是不爱了 也不是不快乐
wǒ bú shì bù ài le yě bú shì bù kuài lè
It's not that I don't love anymore, nor that I'm unhappy.
只是我的心跳 它已犯下了大错
zhǐ shì wǒ de xīn tiào tā yǐ fàn xià le dà cuò
It's just that my heartbeat has made a huge mistake.
不知游荡了多久 瞬间感觉失落
bù zhī yóu dàng le duō jiǔ shùn jiān gǎn jué shī luò
I don't know how long I've wandered, suddenly feeling lost.
眼前都是我们回忆 其他什么都看不到
yǎn qián dōu shì wǒ men huí yì qí tā shén me dōu kàn bú dào
Before me are all our memories; I can't see anything else.
这不是我要的 这不是我想的
zhè bú shì wǒ yào de zhè bú shì wǒ xiǎng de
This is not what I want; this is not what I think.
自由不是自由 爱或不爱都罪恶
zì yóu bú shì zì yóu ài huò bù ài dōu zuì è
Freedom is not freedom; love or not loving is a sin.
这颗心不再为你跳
zhè kē xīn bù zài wèi nǐ tiào
This heart no longer beats for you.
这颗心不再 这颗心不再为你跳
zhè kē xīn bù zài zhè kē xīn bù zài wèi nǐ tiào
This heart no longer, this heart no longer beats for you.

Mandarin learning guide

Learn with 內疚

This guide uses the lyric’s repeated contrast between leaving, guilt, and freedom to study everyday Mandarin in a tightly connected context. The song keeps returning to the same core ideas, so it is useful for noticing repetition, negation, and cause-and-result phrasing.

negation and contrast; cause-and-result phrasing; emotion words in narrative lyrics

What to listen for

The lyrics present a speaker who explains a decision to leave while rejecting a simple reading of the situation. Across repeated sections, the song moves from confusion and memory to direct statements about freedom, regret, and guilt, with several lines repeating to emphasize the same emotional turn. This makes it a good short study text for seeing how Mandarin uses 不是…也不是…, 就是, 只是在, and 这不是… to clarify feelings and motives.

  • Recognize how the lyric uses double negation to narrow meaning.
  • Understand how reasons and consequences are stated with 这就是 and 就算.
  • Notice how repeated lines reinforce emotional contrast and decision-making.

How the song moves

Opening explanation

The speaker begins with a reaction to crying and gives a reason for wanting to leave.

Conflict and escape

The lyric contrasts a once-beautiful image with a heart that no longer responds, then shifts to reclaiming freedom and escaping.

Reflection and return

Later lines repeat the same ideas about regret, memory, and not being what was wanted.

Translation choices

你还不太懂 问 怎么又哭了

nǐ hái bù tài dǒng wèn zěn me yòu kū le

Natural English
You still don’t quite understand; you ask, ‘Why are you crying again?’
Why
This keeps the dialogue-like question and the repeated ‘again’ feeling of 又, while making the line sound natural in English.

但这颗心不再为你跳 内疚藏不了

dàn zhè kē xīn bù zài wèi nǐ tiào nèi jiù cáng bù liǎo

Natural English
But this heart no longer beats for you; guilt can’t be hidden.
Why
The first clause is a direct emotional shift, and the second clause states the inability to hide 內疚 clearly and compactly.

自由不是自由 爱或不爱都罪恶

zì yóu bú shì zì yóu ài huò bù ài dōu zuì è

Natural English
Freedom is not really freedom; to love or not love, either way is sinful.
Why
The line uses paradox and repetition, so the translation preserves the rhetorical effect instead of smoothing it into a plain statement.

Useful Mandarin from the song

那就是理由nà jiù shì lǐ yóuthat is the reason

This is a straightforward way to point back to an explanation already implied in context. It works well in spoken and written Mandarin when identifying a cause.

如果你不想去,那就是理由。rú guǒ nǐ bù xiǎng qù, nà jiù shì lǐ yóu。If you don’t want to go, that’s the reason.
就算jiù suàneven if

就算 introduces a condition that may happen, while the main action still follows. The lyric uses it to accept regret without changing the decision.

就算下雨,我也会去。jiù suàn xià yǔ, wǒ yě huì qù。Even if it rains, I’ll still go.
不是不bú shì bùit’s not that not…

This pattern softens a statement by denying an obvious interpretation. Here it helps the speaker explain the feeling without saying the opposite directly.

我不是不帮你,只是现在很忙。wǒ bú shì bù bāng nǐ, zhǐ shì xiàn zài hěn máng。It’s not that I won’t help you; I’m just very busy right now.
爱或不爱ài huò bù àito love or not love

This paired structure sets up two opposite choices. In the lyric it helps express a moralized contrast between alternatives.

去或不去,你自己决定。qù huò bù qù, nǐ zì jǐ jué dìng。Go or not go, you decide.

Listen closely

  • Listen for repeated lines: the lyric returns to the same statements, which helps show the speaker’s fixed decision.
  • Notice the shift from explanation to rejection: lines about what is not wanted lead into stronger statements about freedom and guilt.
  • Pay attention to contrast words such as 但, 只是, and 也不是; they organize the lyric’s emotional movement.

Check your understanding

  1. Which line most clearly shows a double-negation explanation, and what does it mean?

    Show answer

    我不是不爱了 也不是不快乐; it means the speaker is not saying love or happiness is simply absent.

  2. What does 就算后悔在等著我表达 in this lyric?

    Show answer

    It means the speaker accepts that regret may come, but still keeps the decision to leave.

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